An older gentleman was on the operating table waiting for his surgery to begin. He had insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation.
As he was about to be given the anesthesia, he asked to speak with his son.
“Yes, Dad, what is it?
“Don’t be nervous, son,” said his dad. “Do your best, and just remember: if it doesn’t go well, if something happens to me, your mother is going to come and live with you and your wife.”
A woman was taking her time browsing through everything at a friend’s yard sale and said to her, “My husband is going to be very angry I stopped at a yard sale.”
“I’m sure he will understand when you tell him about all the bargains you found,” her friend replied.
“Normally, yes,” she said. “But he just broke his leg, and he’s waiting for me to take him to the hospital to have it set.”