Our Ask An Angel correspondent is Arlene Petersen, Life Care Navigation Specialist in the area of senior home care.
Q. Now that I am in my āgolden years,ā I am seeing my neighbors and friends pass on, and this is leaving me with a feeling of great sadness. I feel alone, too. I donāt know how to cope some days.
A. Our friends are so important and add so much to our lives. No matter when it occurs, losing a friend or loved one is difficult. It is especially difficult as we age and we see our precious friends leaving our lives. I think sometimes we tend to bury our feelings and try to move on without help. We try to do it alone. It is very important to allow yourself to really grieve.
Something that might help as you struggle through loss is to talk and reminisce about your friends. Walking down memory lane can actually bring a smile to your heart. Recognize your emotions and be aware of feeling sad versus feeling depressed. Allow yourself to cry.
Some of us stuff our feelings, but I encourage you to surround yourself with a good support system where you can openly share your emotions. Itās okay to ask for help. If you live alone, it might even be a good idea to enlist the help of a personal caregiver to provide simple companionship.
This simple step can really be the highlight of your day or week. A caregiver can come alongside you and listen as you reminisce, can accompany you to do shopping and errands, or can just sit and play a few card games or board games with you. The point is to stay social and not isolate yourself and to be good to yourself. Surround yourself with positive influences, good friends, good books, uplifting music, and such.
In time, your heart will be lifted, but it is important to give yourself permission to go through the process of grieving. If your sadness lingers, it may be time to speak with your doctor. You may be experiencing some depression. It never hurts to consult your practitioner, just to make sure.
ā¢ Have a question for our angel correspondent? You can send our angel an email to apetersen@visitingangels.com or send your question via mail to Ask An Angel, 65 Woodbury St., South Elgin, IL 60177.
