Our Ask An Angel correspondent is Arlene Petersen, Certified Senior Advisor and Life Care Navigation Specialist in the area of senior home care.
Q. My fatherās diet is absolutely horrible, and it includes mostly carbs as well as sweets. I saw a change in his weight after my mother died where he has actually gained weight, and I wonder how I can get him back on track.
A. When someone loses a spouse, the grieving process can take many forms. Sometimes it comes out through a change in eating habits. You might want to intervene slowly and with respect and dignity. If he is close by, is it possible you can pop by now and then to see how his pantry and refrigerator are stocked? Why not bring over a few fruits and vegetables he might like to munch on as an alternative to the sweets? Are you able to go grocery shopping with him where you can gently suggest some ideas for an easy and healthy meal? If you notice that he is resistant, you might want to prepare a few meals and freeze them so he can easily warm them in the microwave. A plan will help you to intervene without being overbearing. Most parents donāt enjoy being reprimanded by their children, but there are times when we turn into the āparentā. If you canāt be closely involved with your fatherās meal planning, you may want to enlist the help of a caregiver. A caregiver can shop with him, plan with him, and prepare meals for or even with him. Iāve seen many grieving spouses take a turn for the worse when they lose their loved one. Iāve also seen the bad habits turned around when a few extra steps are taken. Your dad may just need to establish a new routine and a caregiver can certainly do that. Once he is on a good path, he can do it solo. You can give it a try and take note of any changes!
Have a question for our angel correspondent? You can send our angel an email to apetersen@visitingangels.com or send your question via mail to Ask An Angel, 65 Woodbury St., South Elgin, IL 60177.
