Q. I have been the primary caregiver for my mother for the past five years. She recently passed away and I am feeling overwhelmed with grief, but also feel lost as a person. I struggle with any attempts to live a ānormalā life and donāt know how to navigate the empty feelings I have. How do I rebuild myself as a person?
A. Grief is difficult to navigate for many of us. The loss of identity when caring for someone can compound the loss you are suffering and yes, all of this can make you question just who you are. The support of good, loving friends is very important for you right now, but even more, the help from a professional can be invaluable. This can look like many things. Your community hospital has resources that can be a great comfort. Every hospital has a chaplain that can help you and your entire family process the loss of you mother. They can also point you in the direction of support groups as well as individual counselors. Your sense of self was rooted in your role as a caregiver, and now that this role is gone, so is your identity. Itās very important to listen to the empty places inside of you and provide self-care through the support of resources available to you. We are not meant to walk through life alone. You may not have made much room for this as you cared for your mother so the thought of self-care may sound foreign to you, but it is absolutely necessary for you to pay attention to it. It will not only help you as you grieve, but it will help you build a sense of worth where you can find joy in yourself and the world around you.
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