Our Ask An Angel correspondent is Arlene Petersen, Life Care Navigation Specialist in the area of senior home care.
Q. This will be my first holiday spent alone. My husband died six months ago and we never had children. I don’t know how to get through the long winter by myself as well.
A. I am so sorry to hear about your loss. The holidays are full of hustle and bustle and it is an exciting time for many. For some, however, it can be a time of sadness or loneliness. It may be that this season will be a time of grieving and it is okay to have some down time. By this I mean giving yourself permission to rest, to have quiet time, and to reflect on memories you shared with your husband. It may be that you can put off your time of celebrating until a later date. However, if the thought of being alone during the holidays brings discomfort, let’s look at how you can make strides to surround yourself with the joy of the season. If you have friends nearby, it might be nice to host a gathering in your home to celebrate the season. Nothing fancy is required. A coffee or tea get-together can be festive and heartwarming. Many senior centers have holiday parties for the community and it only takes a phone call to see what the social calendar holds for your closest senior center. Look for resources in your community. Another great source of plugging in is through your local church or house of worship. There are many beautiful services or holiday programs offered through local churches. If you can serve in the community, that is an excellent way to find fulfillment and purpose. It helps get the focus on others. If it is difficult to get around town, a caregiver can help you visit and participate in the activities you might be interested in. Only time will heal the loss of your husband, but engaging in the community combined with the spirit of giving of your time and talent can do wonders for your state of mind as well as fill the empty places of your heart.
Have a question for our angel correspondent? You can send our angel an email to apetersen@visitingangels.com or send your question via mail to Ask An Angel, 65 Woodbury St., South Elgin, IL 60177.
