Our Ask An Angel correspondent is Re Kielar, Life Care Navigation Specialist in the area of senior home care.
Q. The holidays come and go, and always make me feel a little blue and often I find it hard to get out of the slump. Iām sure Iām not alone with these emotions. What do people do to get through the season, which is supposed to be festive?
A. Itās true that the holidays are an exciting time, but they can also be filled with some down moments that we sometimes donāt fully understand. Those feelings can be confusing, especially when the holidays are āsupposedā to be happy and festive. Different things can bring on sad or even depressed feelings. Often, the holidays bring about reminiscing, and while that can be a good thing, it can also lead to feelings of loneliness, which can lead to melancholy. A good mental exercise as you reflect on holidays gone by, it to focus on the positive aspects of your memories verses the loss of the memory. Celebrate the good memories with family or other people in your life. Talking is healthy! There are other things that can bring on sad emotions, but there is always a choice involved on our part. I am not saying it is going to be easy, but recognizing those choices is a good step in a positive direction. Other ābluesā fighting activities you can do includes staying active. Invite family and friends over. You can create a celebratory environment. You donāt need a holiday to make that happen! Volunteer locally by exploring ways you can pour your kindness and talents into someone elseās life. Helping others is a natural mood lifter. Be aware of things that could bring you down. Alcohol, for example could bring on depressive feelings. So, while eggnog may taste great, beware of the alcohol content and its effects! As you pay attention to what brings you down, give yourself permission to feel sadness or other emotions in your heart. But have āplan Bā in place. Fill yourself with a positive path to get through those feelings. Confide in someone! Talk about your feelings; it can help you understand why you feel the way you do.
On a personal level, I have found that creating a thankfulness journal is a great way to keep my focus on the positives in my life, rather than the negatives. Each day, I write down ten things I am thankful for in my journal. You can use a spiral notebook, or a special journal book that is just for those thankful entries.
I also know there are caregiving agencies that can make arrangements for companionship assignments. Having a cheerful caregiver visit you, especially if you feel isolated, can lift your spirits with a short visit in your home. Caregivers can play cards, read books, or help with home projects. And this time of year, caregivers can help with holiday decorating, baking, card writing, and shopping!
If your melancholy feelings persist, it might be a good idea to speak with your doctor. There may be other factors involved. There is no shame in talking to your primary care physician to explore the reasons behind your emotions.
Have a question for our angel correspondent? You can send our angel an email to rkielar@visitingangels.com.
