Q. I was helping my elderly mom with her spring cleaning and noticed that sheās let her house go, so to speak. My mother was one who always kept a tidy home, believing in the āthereās a place for everything, and everything has its place,ā philosophy. As we were cleaning, I noticed a stack of junk mail piled on the counter, dirty dishes she had put away in the cupboards, and an unusual buildup of dust on every surface. Iām concerned about her well-being and I am nervous about her living home alone, especially since my dad, her husband, passed away last year. My siblings and I have discussed hiring help for her. What is your advice?
A. First of all, Iām sorry to hear of your dadās passing. Losing a loved one is a big adjustment, no matter the circumstances. On a positive note, it sounds like your mother has wonderful support from her adult children and I think itās fantastic that youāre willing to help her with her spring cleaning!
I want to reassure you that many adult children often worry about their aging parents, especially those that live alone. From what youāve shared, it sounds like it is time to bring in additional support for your mom. It could be that sheās been feeling depressed since losing her husband, or perhaps your dad took care of more than you realized, and your mom canāt seem to keep up with it all. Either way, additional support will only help your mom as she grieves and give you and your siblings peace of mind.
When it comes to home care, there are plenty of options. You could start with yourself and your siblings. If distance isnāt an issue, you can create a rotation amongst you all and take turns checking in with your mom, assisting her with her errands or household chores. Another option is to hire a home cleaning service, in order to take away the burden of household cleaning. Still yet, you can consider a senior in-home care company, which provides a variety of senior care services that may meet the needs of your mom, as well as you and your siblings. A senior in-home care company can provide companionship for your mom, who is most likely in need of a friendly face as she grieves. In-home care companies also help with light housekeeping, running errands, bathing, dressing, meal preparation, medication reminders, and so much more. The best part of in-home care is that most companies offer care 24/7, so you arenāt limited to a certain time of day or day of week. You can choose to have a caregiver present when you and your siblings arenāt available, and when your mom needs help the most. Perhaps you begin with a caregiver once a week, for a couple of hours, and, over time, adjust the frequency as needed.
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