Q. My spouse and I are at a bit of a crossroads, and we could use some guidance. We’re in our early sixties, still working, and have recently become empty nesters. With our children having flown the coop, our once bustling home now feels a little too spacious for just the two of us.
We’re contemplating the idea of downsizing, yet are unsure about whether it’s the right move for us and, if so, how to go about it.
One of the main considerations we’re grappling with is timing. How do we know when it’s the right time to downsize? On one hand, our current home holds a lot of sentimental memories, and the thought of leaving it behind feels daunting. On the flip side, maintaining a large house is becoming increasingly impractical and expensive.
We also are hesitant to downsize because we aren’t sure what type of living arrangement would suit us best in this next phase of our lives. Should we opt for a smaller house or consider downsizing to a condo or townhouse? And how do we let go of belongings that hold sentimental value without feeling like we’re losing a part of ourselves? We appreciate your expertise so that we can be sure we’ve thought of all angles before we make a decision.
A. Thank you for reaching out. First, let me assure you that you’re not alone in navigating this journey. Many couples find themselves in a similar position, balancing the desire to downsize with the attachment to their current home and the memories it holds. It’s normal to experience a wide range of emotions as you weigh your options.
When it comes to timing, there’s no one-size-fits-all answer. It ultimately depends on your individual circumstances, priorities, and long-term goals. However, a good starting point is to assess your current lifestyle and needs. Are you finding that your current home requires more upkeep and maintenance than you’re comfortable with? Are you feeling overwhelmed by the empty rooms and space now that your children have moved out? These might be indicators that downsizing could be a beneficial option for you.
As for the type of living arrangements, it’s worth exploring different options and considering what best aligns with your lifestyle preferences and long-term plans. Condos or townhouses often offer low-maintenance lifestyle amenities that cater to empty nesters, while smaller houses provide more space and privacy. There’s also the option of a zero-lot-line property, which often offers more house space but less yard maintenance.
Think about what features are most important to you and weigh the pros and cons of each option.
Emotionally, downsizing can indeed be challenging, especially when it involves letting go of belongings that hold sentimental value. Take your time to go through your possessions and prioritize what truly matters to you. Consider preserving memories through photographs or keepsakes, even if you need to part with physical items. Ask your children if there’s anything they’d like to have and pass it along so they can enjoy it now. Remember that downsizing isn’t about losing a part of yourselves but rather about welcoming a new chapter.
Ultimately, downsizing is a personal decision that should be made with careful consideration and communication between you and your spouse. Seek advice from financial advisors or real estate professionals who can provide valuable insights based on your specific circumstances.
Have a question for our angel correspondent? Send our angel an email at jcbarrett@visitingangels.com, or write in at Ask An Angel, 65 Woodbury St., South Elgin, IL 60177.
