Q. Iām worried about my mom and could use some guidance. Sheās always been fairly active, but after having knee surgery last year, she went through physical therapy, made great progress, and then… just stopped. Now she insists sheās fine and doesnāt āneedā to exercise anymore, but I can see how much less she moves. Sheās more sedentary and complains about stiffness. Even simple things like getting up from a chair are becoming more difficult for her.
Iāve tried gently encouraging her to exercise more. Iāve offered to go on short walks together, suggested we join a fun exercise class, and even reminded her how much better she felt when she was moving regularly. She continues to wave me off and says sheās doing āenough.ā I know she doesnāt want to feel like a burden, but I also know how important movement is, especially as she ages.
How can I help her see that staying active isnāt just about recovering from surgery but also about maintaining her independence and quality of life? I donāt want to nag her, but I also donāt want to sit back and watch her lose mobility. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
A. Your love and concern for your mom are evident, and understandably, you want to help her remain active and independent. It seems she may view exercise as something necessary only for recovery, rather than as a lifelong habit. The key is to shift the conversation from exercise to the concept of staying strong and independent.
Instead of framing movement as a chore, try tying it to things she values. Does she love spending time with grandkids? Gardening? Shopping? Remind her that keeping her strength up will allow her to enjoy those things longer and with less discomfort. You might also introduce simple, low-pressure ways to incorporate movement into her day, such as suggesting she stretch while watching her favorite show or take a short stroll after dinner.
Appealing to her sense of logic may help. Staying active isnāt just about fitness, itās about preserving her ability to do the things she enjoys. Regular movement helps seniors maintain endurance, strength, and balance, all of which reduce the risk of falls and injuries. It can also ease joint pain, improve circulation, and boost overall energy levels. Most importantly, staying active allows older adults to live independently for longer, making everyday tasks like getting out of a chair, climbing stairs, or carrying groceries easier and safer. By staying mobile now, sheās investing in her future self.
Another approach is to enlist a third party. Sometimes, advice from a doctor, physical therapist, or even a peer carries more weight than what we hear from loved ones. You could encourage her to ask her doctor about the best ways to stay active at her next appointment or ask a friend to invite her for a weekly walk.
Make it enjoyable! If she likes socializing, a gentle yoga or water aerobics class might be more appealing than a home workout. If sheās hesitant, start small and be patient. Remember, every bit of movement counts and will help her rebuild endurance so that she can move more in the future.
Youāre doing the right thing by looking out for her, and with a little creativity and encouragement, she may just come around.
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