MY SUN DAY NEWS
June 5, 2014
My mom has been living a very healthy life until recently. She now suffers from panic attacks and canāt leave the house. Iām constantly checking on her and making sure she is okay. I donāt have much patience some days. Help!
Q. This winter has been very hard on me, keeping me indoors. I am more than ready to get out and garden now. Iām a little concerned on how to tackle this after being so sedentary all winter.
Q. I had to move my mother to a memory care community in the area. Since she moved there, I have visited her every day. Now that she is settled, she expects me to continue to visit every day, and I just canāt do it anymore. I work full time and find little time for myself and my spouse. I donāt mind visiting, but I am drained.
The idea of using a walker can be quite frightening. Yes, itās a tool designed to make ambulation safe, but it can create a feeling of dependence. For some, it may bring about of how fragile we can become as we age.
Question: My children are recommending a companion to stop by my home twice a week. I donāt see the need or really know why they insist. I can do just about everything by myself, itās just that I live alone and sometimes wish I had a little company. My children all work and live far away.
Q. I am so happy the weather is changing, and I want to start exercising. I am a little afraid to start. I donāt exercise, and I donāt want to hurt myself after a long winter of sitting around.
Q. My mom lives alone, and last month, she fell in her home. Luckily, she didn’t break anything, but we whisked her to the ER to make sure she was O.K. She hasnāt fallen again but that is my biggest fear now (and hers as well). I am constantly worried, and she refuses help when I offer suggestions to make a few changes in her home.
Q. This new year has brought some challenges my way, mostly with my time. It seems like there is always something to do, a call to make, or rushing here and there for some reason or another. I like to be active and busy, but things are out of hand, and I donāt know how to slow down.
Another other area of concern you should think about is verification of references and background checks. When I hire a careĀgiver, I not only conduct state required veriĀfications, but I conduct national background checks, drug testing at the time of interview and ongoing, a DMV check, sex offender checks, and I require three verifiable work references.
Q. I am going to hire a caregiver and a neighbor suggested someone to use. My neighbor told me that this will be cheaper than hiring someone from an agency. I have a few concerns and want to do the right thing. What do you recommend?
My wife suffered a stroke, and I am her caregiver. I hate to admit that I am emotionally spent, and I donāt have any relief in sight. What is available in my community for help?
I am sorry to admit I donāt have a will or trust and was told this is very important. I spoke to a friend who seems to have it all ātogether,ā and I feel so behind in this area. Where do I begin? I am 75 years old.
Question: I will be visiting a friend who I have not seen in quite a while. I know he has had health issues and is very sick. How can I have a meaningful visit with him?
Q. I will be traveling with my mother this holiday season. This is not a first for me, but a first dealing with incontinence challenges for her. Do you have any suggestions so that I can avoid any embarrassing moments for both of us?
Q. Every so often, my daughter asks to borrow a few dollars. Usually, she explains that she is a little low on funds. Lately, her requests have become frequent, and I feel flustered about giving her more, especially since I am on a fixed income. How can I lovingly say no?
Q With the new health care option, I am getting phone calls from organizations about participating in it. I donāt know what is real and what is a scam.
Q. I am moved to tears as I take care of my mother. She has Alzheimerās, and I get frustrated with so many things. How can I maintain my sanity as well as her dignity?
Q. I moved here 10 years ago when I was feeling great. In the past year, many things have changed. I lost my husband and my health has declined. I really want to stay here, but my family is telling me I need to move to assisted living, which I donāt really want to do. I donāt even know what assisted living is. What can I do?
Q. My friend, who I dearly love, is always late for any functions we attend. Since I donāt drive, I am reluctant to say anything about this. What can I do?
Q. Is there a way to stay mentally sharp with natural means, such as food or vitamins?
Q. I am 82. I have lived my life raising my family and helping those around me. I have realized, though, that I still have dreams. Am I being silly or can I really pursue them?
Q.I have been experiencing severe anxiety to the point where I cannot function. I thought I was going to be in relaxation mode in my golden years, but this is far from it. When I have anxiety, I am almost physically paralyzed. Iāve even gone to the emergency room.
Q: I am thinking about taking a yoga class, but I am not sure if it is the right form of exercise for me. I am 78.
Q.Ā Help, I cannot sleep at night. I can fall asleep fine, but then I wake up in the middle of the night and canāt fall back asleep.
Q. I took my mom to the emergency room and discovered how ill prepared I was. It turned into a stressful experience. Do you have any tips on how to make it an easier process?
Q. I recently visited an old friend who I have not seen in a while, and I was taken aback by the clutter in her home. Papers were all over the counters as well as lots of dirty dishes on the counter. Things just didnāt look right. I would not categorize her as a hoarder, but I think it could be the start of something. Do you have suggestions of how help her without being offensive?
Q. Now that I am in my āgolden years,ā I am seeing my neighbors and friends pass on, and this is leaving me with a feeling of great sadness. I feel alone, too. I donāt know how to cope some days.
Q. I have heard that itās very easy to get sick when flying on an airplane. What can I do to protect myself?
Q. I take my mother to her doctor visits and find that it can be a stress filled time because we always seem to forget to bring something up. What can we do to alleviate any stressors?
I am hoping to take a well-deserved vacation early this summer. I take care of my father and am his only caregiver. Do you have suggestions of how I can have peace of mind while I am gone? I plan to be gone for 10 days.
